More on coping with pet loss

Many of us consider our pets and animal companions to be family. They share joy, compassion, unconditional love with us and brighten our lives.

Considering this bond we have with them, it is only natural that grieve when they leave us. When we experience this loss and deep grief we often feel alone in our grief and that others do not understand.

Most people are uncomfortable around grief and loss. And often our grief comes with the addition of hurt when people minimize or discount our feelings with comments of “it’s only an animal”, or other unthinking comments.

Losing your pet to reasons other than age, perhaps the difficult decision to euthanize, a loss through disappearance, violent and sudden deaths from injury, and sudden illness will complicate your grief.

Understand that grieving is ok, it’s natural. It’s a progress that will have its ups and downs. Allow your emotions to happen and move through the changes.

I found a site through a post from a friend for tips on coping, http://www.pet-loss.net/index.shtml  the article was written by by Moira Anderson Allen, M.Ed.

• Why you feel the way you do


• Why it isn't "crazy" to grieve for a beloved pet


• How to cope with the pain you're feeling


• How to help your children deal with the loss


• What to do when other pets miss their companion


• When, how and why to make the decision of euthanasia


• What to do with a pet's remains


• When to consider getting a new pet (with tips on what to do and what to avoid)


• How to improve your chances of recovering a lost or stolen pet


• How to protect your pets during an emergency or disaster


• How to help a friend cope with loss

 Some ways to help you through your grief, I know these certainly helped me. Share your emotions, feelings, and memories, talk to friends, and seek out a grief counselor and to talk with.

Know that while it is extremely painful now, the pain does lessen.

Take some time to create something for yourself of a good memory, a poem, a picture, something to honor their time with you.

Make a list of the gifts they shared with you or gave you. Know that the best gifts they gave to you are compassion, love and joy. Remember with joy those lessons, and try to incorporate them into your daily routine to share with other animals or people. This can actually be very cathartic. I took the time to learn the Tellington Ttouch, so that I could be closer and communicate better with all animals. It was my way of sharing the gift of love and healing they gave me. The results of sharing it have been so amazing and wonderful. 

Remember that many people try to give you ideas on how to cope with the loss. They might not always say the right or tactful thing, but they mean well.

And don't withdraw, there are others who need you too. If any emotion rules supreme when a pet dies, it is guilt. No matter what the circumstances of our loss, guilt is there, grabbing us by the throat. It haunts our days, ruins our sleep, and tarnishes our memories. Often, guilt goes beyond the loss itself; we may start to feel guilty for just about everything.

Don't let guilt keep you locked in a lifetime of misery. Choose to forgive, to love, and to move forward. The world needs you! Remember their gifts to you!