Small Dog Mentality....

So, I went back to work today after two days off from a bad back. The dogs are always happy to have someone home with them all day. Understand, I have a small herd of Chihuahuas, 3 to be exact. Once upon a time it was 4. They are all a bit older and for the most part mellow. Lil'Shit being the eldest and most needy these days. With Thumbelina being the smallest and thinks she's the most independent and ferocious.

Things I have learned over the years living with little dogs (as Yummy the cat sits draped over my shoulder and encouraging me to write this).

1. They truly have no concept of their size. Their whole attitude says Rottweiler.

2. They are vengeful when things don't go their way. For example, you come home from work and turn around without sitting with them for at least 1/2 hour and go out again for supper. You come home to find that the coffee table is cleared off and what was once on it is now littering the floor, or.... you find a lovely pile of fresh poo behind the front door, or..... something is chewed up. And as you grumble and clean up they sit there looking like innocent angels blaming the cat.

3. Never, ever come between a small dog and their food or bone, it's a sure fire way to get bitten.

4. Never underestimate their loyalty and protectiveness to the person they choose as their person. Patting that person's knee or even kissing or touching that person is another way to get bitten.

5. They can love everyone when they choose to, unless you are the vet with a syringe or nail clippers. Then they become miniature tasmanian devils, all teeth!

6. The smaller they are, the cuter they are right? Don't let the size fool you, they're a devil in cute clothes.

7. They can be very needy when they choose to be, and are kind of like leeches, pick them up and you can't detach them from you again without some sort of surgery involved.

8. Only if they choose to will they allow themselves to be housebroken. If they choose not to be, there is absolutely nothing in the world you can do to change it.

9. You will never be more stubborn than they are. See #8, you can leave them outside all day in the hopes that they will figure out that outside is the place to go, and it won't work, they won't leave the door, and will hold it all day till you give in.

10. They are either very finicky eaters or eat everything except what is good for them. All but one of my dogs loves the raw diet. The other, if you put it in her bowl she won't touch it. But if you drop a piece of raw meat on the floor accidentally, she'll gobble it down like a piranha.

11. Speaking of piranhas, who needs a floor cleaner in the kitchen. You drop food, you either need to be very very very quick in getting it off the floor or be prepared to lose fingers. Doesn't matter what you dropped, even if it's a lemon or dill pickle, it's human food and it's theirs when it hits the floor.

12. Be prepared to have  bells on their collars or some other noisemaking device for when they start aging and losing sight or hearing. You need to know where they are, otherwise you are always falling over them.

13. Older little dogs and stairs. Be prepared to carry them up and down the stairs as their coordination and balance is not that great on their own and they tend to fall down the stairs without injury quite often. Or put up a child gate at the bottom of the stairs.

14. Oh, speaking of child gates..... don't get the ones with the diamond plastic mesh in them, they are too easily chewed through by a tiny determined dog that feels they should not be locked out of any room in the house.

15. Strange chewing habits..... Let's see, I had one who felt she must audition for Frederick's of Hollywood and create all these custom crotchless panties and pants if she could get to them. Her daughter has a thing for chewing through small plugged in electrical cords, like those for cell phone charging. Another loves anything of paper, tissue, napkin, or paper towels if he can get to them.

16. And be prepared for other OCD issues as they get older. Lil'Shit has a think about licking everything, fabric, ankles, toes, shoe insides, you name it. It's rather unnerving when he goes up to a guest and begins licking their ankles. LOL Hmmmm, Poppy on the other hand, if she feels you are even remotely close to where she has staked her claim, even if she is sound asleep, she will bark sharply and growl and snap. Usually no one is remotely close.

17. If they wish to be trained they will be and it'll be a breeze, usually they don't wish to, and will tolerate only the absolute things they must tolerate, like leashes.

18.  And either they are very social and love everyone, or they are scared of everyone new and have to bark constantly, or just only like their owners.